Julie's story

Julie's story

At first my boyfriend was so considerate, and overly friendly. Once we started dating he started to accuse me of cheating on him, and would call me a 'slut'. He would repeatedly call to "check-up" on me. When he say me dancing with a male friend, he grabbed my arm and I fell down a flight of steps trying to get away from him. One night, he held me down and wouldn't let me leave his house.

The worst part was that I went along with everything. He would break up with me, and then I would take him back. He blamed me for his behavior, saying that if I was trustable, he wouldn't have to check on me. He would ask my friends if I was trustworthy and would check to see if my car was at work. Many times women believe that they would recognize abuse, I believed that. I am an educated woman, from a good family, with a job, and a secure future. I never thought I would end up in an abusive relationship. It was so subtle - he stole my self worth.

How I coped

After we broke up, he started to stalk me. I made two police reports against him and took him to court for a restraining order. I didn't get it. He followed me everywhere I went, sent lewd messages, threatened me. Six months later, he damaged my car. It has been a year, my friends have been a good support and a local abuse support service has helped.